Granny can hear again. Good. She also has a sore bum. Boil turned out to be - wait for it - oh the humiliation; chalfonts.... rhyming slang for haemorrhoids - piles to you. Clinic thought it was a boil like she did, despatched her to Arrecife General Urgencia - comparison with an English A&E much to the disadvantage of the latter. Problem sorted with two nurses plus doctor, while granny in very undignified (could be perverse in other circumstances) posture. She pointed out the indignity in her best Spanish, making them laugh. Better that way probably. Not much else to laugh about. Bugger it. Looked up on Internet, advice on avoiding affliction involves everything she does anyway - exercise, fruit, vegetables, etc etc etc. Well there you go.

Pregnant cat much disapproved of by feline Houdini turned out actually to be neutered male and sick. Has been dispatched to Animal Rescue. Clouds are gathering, rain still doesn't come. Grannyp